What Type Of Drinker Are You?

What Type of Drinker Are You?

How Drinking Changes with Age, Stage, and Tolerance

 I’ve shared in previous emails that alcohol affects people in different ways depending on genetics, psychology, brain chemistry, hormonal changes, and environment. But there are definite patterns of drinking that we can fall into at different stages. These patterns shift and evolve depending on what’s going on in our lives.

 When I was at my worst my drinking pattern changed dramatically over a relatively short period of time.  I went from an on/off, moderating grey area drinker to someone with a daily habit, looking for any excuse to pour a glass of wine.

 These drinking patterns are often categorized into ‘Alcohol Use Profiles,’. These profiles reflect the way we interact with alcohol, and I have found them to be a useful guide for those in the contemplative stage of questioning their relationship with alcohol.

 For those of us who are already off the booze, but might be romanticizing its value, it’s also a good reminder of the inevitable decent that can happen when we aim for moderation.

 Change first requires awareness so being aware of these profiles and recognizing when your drinking may have shifted between patterns, can be the first step toward making future decisions about your drinking.

 Below are the four main drinking profiles and how they can fluctuate over time.

The Four Types of Drinkers

 Type 1 – Low Relief, Low Reward

 These folk are biologically wired in such a way that alcohol doesn’t provide much relief from stress or a strong sense of reward. They might drink occasionally in social settings, but alcohol doesn’t have the strong pull that many of us feel.  Drinking for Type 1 is more of a casual or optional activity rather than a necessity.

 Type 2 – Low Relief, High Reward

This individual drinks mainly for fun and social enjoyment. They aren’t necessarily using alcohol to cope with stress, but they enjoy the high, energy boost, and confidence it provides. They are likely to be social drinkers and may sometimes binge drink in party settings.

 Type 3 – High Relief, High Reward

 This drinking profile becomes more common as people get older and experience higher levels of stress. Like me, they usually start as low relief, high reward, drinkers but over time alcohol begins to serve a dual purpose: relief from stress or anxiety and an enjoyable reward. It’s common among those who use alcohol to relax after work, deal with social anxiety, and for celebrations and achievements.  Type 3 drinkers are at risk of tipping over into Type 4, especially if life throws a big curveball.

Type 4 – High Relief, Low Reward

At this stage, drinking is no longer about fun and, increasingly about necessity. They drink primarily to manage stress, grief, or emotional pain, and the rewarding effects have diminished. It’s common for heavy drinkers to reach this stage, where they continue drinking out of habit or dependence rather than enjoyment. This stage is often when people start questioning their relationship with alcohol.

 How Drinking Evolves Over Time

To illustrate how drinking profiles can shift, here’s my real-life example:

 A Personal Journey of Alcohol Use

• Ages 15 – 32: My drinking starts as a social activity, mainly for fun and fitting in.
  • Early drinking years: Low relief, high reward – Drinking is new, exciting and, enjoyable.
  • University & parties: High relief, high reward – Drinking relieves social anxiety and is part of being a Uni student, it’s fun and used regularly.

• Ages 32 – 42: My drinking is more about connection and stress relief.
  • I start drinking at home with my partner to bond and unwind: Low relief, high reward
  • Regular drinking socially to connect, relax and celebrate: High relief, high reward

• Ages 42 – 44: My drinking is more frequent and ingrained in daily life.
  • By this stage, drinking has become a regular habit and reliance on it for relief and reward increases. Paired with increased stress and pressure or work, parenting and ageing parents it serves as High relief and high reward

• Ages 44 – 46: With significantly challenging life events alcohol became a coping mechanism rather than a source of pleasure.
  • At this point, I was drinking primarily to manage stress and grief. There wasn’t much fun associated with it anymore, but the habit stuck: High relief, low reward

• Age 46: The juice wasn’t worth the squeeze.  I stopped drinking and sought healthier ways to manage difficult emotions and enjoy my life.

How to Recognize Your Drinking Stage and Take Action

1.  Identify Your Current Profile

 Ask yourself:

• Do I drink mainly for fun or to relieve stress?
• Do I still enjoy drinking, or is it more of a habit?
• Has my tolerance increased? Do I require more alcohol for the same effect?
• Do I find myself drinking even when I don’t really want to?

2.  Be Honest About the Impact

If you find yourself in the High Relief, Low Reward category, it might be time to get curious about your drinking habits. Are you using alcohol as a crutch for stress, anxiety, or grief? If drinking is no longer enjoyable but feels necessary, that’s a sign it may be time for a change.

3.  Experiment with Alternatives

If alcohol has become a coping mechanism, it can be hard to imagine life without it.  But you can start experimenting without taking any dramatic action like quitting.

 Start with small steps.  Even for just one day a week commit to replacing your drink with a healthier alternative like;

• An alcohol-free wine, beer or, Kombucha, something you’ll look forward to
• A short walk outside with motivating music or an audiobook: Physical movement releases endorphins and relieves stress.
• A 5-10 minute mindfulness audio. Lie down and listen to a guided audio for stress relief (you can download one below)

• Call a friend or arrange to meet someone for an alcohol-free drink
• Do a puzzle, jigsaw or, crossword to occupy your mind and stimulate rewarding, creative thinking.

4.  Reduce Gradually or Stop Completely

 Depending on your goals, you might choose to cut back or quit altogether.

You can start this gradually by:

• Setting drink limits for social occasions.
• Taking alcohol-free days or weeks to see how you feel.
• Seeking professional support or coaching if you struggle with being accountable ( like so many of us)

5.  Find a New Definition of “Relief”, “Relax” and “Reward”

If alcohol isn’t providing the same relief or enjoyment, it’s time to redefine what those things mean to you. What truly helps you relax? What makes you feel accomplished or celebrated? Finding new ways to meet these needs is the best way to distance yourself from alcohol.

 If you want to create long-term change a deprivation mindset doesn’t work, or if it does, you spend your time wishing you ‘could’ drink, which is miserable.  In my experience success is found in working on cultivating a new mindset, focused on the joys of missing out on all the downsides of drinking, and bringing in tools and new habits that build a life that is less stressful, more fulfilling, and rewarding.

 When you commit to, focus on and consistently act in new ways, you change your association with alcohol entirely and, your use profile becomes  ‘High relief, High Reward’ without any assistance from a substance.

 Final Thoughts

 Drinking isn’t static—it changes as we go through different life stages, stressors, and experiences because it is an addictive substance that provides short-term benefits. Recognizing your alcohol use profile can help you make informed decisions about whether to continue, cut back, or stop altogether.

 No matter where you are on your journey, remember that real relief and reward come from within—not from a bottle.

If you’re questioning your drinking habits and want support, you can join the April 30 Day Power Pause Waitlist HERE.

If you’d like to try a relaxation practice that can replace your evening drink, try this one HERE.